Being a “Cult”
Having Absolutely No Fun
Like beauty, fun is in the eye of the beholder. I laugh A LOT. I smile A LOT. I’m mostly content with where I am in life and like the things I have and do. No I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I don’t color my language with expletives, and I won’t have sex with anyone that I’m not married to — according to the laws of the land and the tenets of my faith. That’s what leaves me so free to have so much fun!
What I should have asked my friend is what am I really missing out on? People who get drunk get incredibly stupid. I’ve been to work parties where people begin to get inebriated, and they mostly just get a little more obnoxious. Alcohol lowers inhibitions and loosens you up — true. And, without those inhibitions, people make choices that can cause major problems or even alter life forever. How many affairs have started because two people who had a mild interest in each other “loosened up” with some drinks? How many people die each year because drunks “who can handle it” get behind the wheel? How many days are wasted because someone was out partying the night before and woke up completely wasted, sick, and unable to function until nearly the late afternoon?
If I didn’t believe that sex was a divine gift, it would have been very easy for me to become engaged in “no attactment” relationships. What would that have done to my kids? How long would it have been before I was parading men through their lives so fast they couldn’t remember names? Would I have had multiple children by multiple men, or gone sterile (or worse) from the STDs I picked up? I would have needed to work hard to hide my lifestyle, because my ex was looking for any excuse he could find to get custody of the kids. I could have handed it to him on a platter. Even better, I could have left the kids feeling like my sexual exploits were more important to me than they were.
Sure, I may be weird. There may be gatherings where I’m not invited because people know I don’t fit in. (To be honest, it happens in my church, too, but it’s more of a economic thing. That’s what happens when imperfect people come together to try to live their faith: the imperfections sometimes show!) Some people may avoid me because I make them feel uncomfortable. It’s ok. I respect that. Once I learned to see all the good times I have with tons of wonderful people, I wasn’t lonely and I didn’t feel like a misfit anymore. Life got even better when I started reaching out to others and inviting them into my world.
What Is My Brand of Fun?
Good, clean stuff is my brand of fun — just last night I was with two other couples having game night. It was totally relaxing, and strengthened our friendships. We were up late, and had to face how old we’re getting. We just didn’t have any regrets this morning.
I love joking around with kids. When I can let enough of my adult self go to get back into their world, it’s amazing! Kids have endless imaginations, and sometimes the rules are that there are no rules. Kids love corny, kids love energy, and kids love having time spent on them. Totally fun for me.
I love running. For me, I managed to latch on to what gives me joy as I run. I love the feel of my body moving, the rhythm my strides make, the feel of the air in my lungs, and the pulse of my muscles working. I love being outside — I feel closer to God the more natural my surroundings. I love seeing the beauty of trees and flowers, creeks, and animal life. I love the way running clears my head and leaves me more energized for the day.
I love gardening. I like being out in the heat, working to help things grow and produce to their fullest potential. I love the smell of the dirt and the sound of the bugs in the trees nearby. I love learning new tricks and gaining understanding about the needs of individual vegetables and fruits. I also love enjoying and sharing the fruits of my labor.
In the end, I think maybe just being alive is fun. There is so much to love and do, so much that is good, so much to laugh off and so much to just enjoy. In some ways, I feel deeply sad for those who have to use chemicals or other things to bring excitement into their lives — they are missing so much!